Crazy For Crazy Madonna Lyrics

7 of the Strangest Madonna Songs

Source: judiciaryreport.com

I have declared August ‘Madonna Month’.  Now, I know what you're thinking - every month is Madonna Month.  And you would be correct.  But, since Madonna's birthday is in August, I thought it would be a good month to dedicate to Her Madgesty.  As such, I recently re-visited some of her more strange-bordering-on-ridiculous lyrics from her discography.  Don't get me wrong, there is a place for frivolous and downright crazy lyrics in pop music and I still love each of the songs that made the list.  But there have certainly been some "what was she thinking" moments throughout the past 30-plus years of her career.

American Life

Source: flickr.com

I loved the American Life album, which is a firm fan favourite but fell short of commercial success and received mixed reviews from critics, with Blender naming it as one of the worst songs of all time.  The song touches on the corruption of the American dream and the darker side of fame and modern life.  I know every word of Madonna's awkward foray into rap that received much criticism and mockery.  Here is an excerpt:

 

I drive my mini cooper

And I'm feeling super-duper

Yo they tell me I'm a trooper

And you know I'm satisfied

I do yoga and pilates

And the room is full of hotties

So I'm checking out the bodies

And you know I'm satisfied

I'm digging on the isotopes

This metaphysic's shit is dope

And if all this can give me hope

You know I'm satisfied

 

Spanish Lesson

Source:  people.com

This is not one of my favourite songs from the otherwise solid Hard Candy album.  But it is perfect for those wanting to brush up on their Spanish since it seems to have been written with the help of a Spanish phrase book.  I'm just not sure she would make a very good teacher:  "If you do your homework, baby I will give you more".  The implied “more” would be rather inappropriate in a teacher-student relationship.

Yo te quiero means I love you
Mucho gusto means I'm welcome to you
Senorita, I just wanna fall in love
Callate means close your mouth
Besame means give me love
Senorita, she just wanna fall in love

I'm Going Bananas

Source: slantmagazine.com

Taken from the Dick Tracy soundtrack, this song has a Carmen Miranda feel to it, with Madonna declaring that she is “going bananas” in a Spanish accent.  Perhaps the off-beat lyrics are appropriate considering the expression means “to go crazy” or “to become emotional”.  But "I feel like a tooth being drilled, a nerve being killed by a dentist"? That has to be one of the most bizarre similes in music history.

I'm going bananas
And I feel like my poor little mind
Is being devoured by piranhas
For I'm going bananas

I'm non compos mentes
And I feel like a tooth being drilled
A nerve being killed by a dentist
For I'm non compos mentes

Super Pop

Super Pop was originally intended as an extra track on the Confessions album but was omitted and made available as a download from the official Madonna fan site.  The song is a string of conditionals (so a good resource for ESL teachers) and includes several nods to famous historical figures, including Cassius Clay, Marlon Brando and Frida Kahlo.  In a Today.com article, a listener is quoted as offering a less than glowing review: “If you thought the rap in American Life [was] painful to the ears, wait until you hear this.”

If I was an animal I would be a dog (sound of barking)
If I was a dog I would be a man (sound of a car revving)

Superstar

Source: thatgrapejuice.com

This song is ideal for teaching rhyming couplets because that's pretty much the structure of the entire song.  I think Madonna literally Googled "what rhymes with..." while writing the song that showers her other half with praise and offers a host of gifts including a massage.

Ooh la la you're my superstar
Ooh la la love the way that you are
You can have the password to my phone
I'll give you a massage when you get home

Impressive Instant

Source:  fanshare.com

This song is from the Music album where Madonna, with the help of producer Mirwais Ahmadzai, did some amazing experimental stuff with synths, guitars, bass lines and healthy dose of autotune.  I love this song but this part, with her voice autotuned to the max, is fantastically bizarre:

I like to singy, singy, singy
Like a bird on a wingy, wingy, wingy
I like to rumba, rumba, rumba
Dance to a samba, samba, samba

Body Shop

Source: drownedmadonna.com

Body Shop is a very creative and at times confusing extended metaphor, in which she compares her body to a car and her lover to a mechanic who looks "under the hood".  I have no idea what the fender, gasket and suspension represent.

You can polish the headlights
You can smooth up the fender
Blowing a gasket
Tighten up the suspension

Special mention:

Trust No Bitch (Demo)

I wish this song had made it onto the Rebel Heart album, if only as a bonus track on the deluxe edition.  It features Natalia Kills and warns women everywhere that you can't trust a bitch, not even your bestie:  "Besties, had your hand on his testes".  The song concludes with some epic shade courtesy of Natalia:  "You're as cheap as your weave and as fake as your tits".  Crazy and hilarious!